262597318250933

‘What-if’ thinking versus ‘what-is’ thinking

'What-if' thinking versus 'what-is' thinking

“What-if” thinking is a common response to trauma, creating imagined scenarios to anticipate danger. While it’s a natural protective instinct, it can evolve into hyper-alertness, posing potential problems.

 

For example, you might picture being attacked at a party or betrayed by someone you trust. This imagined scenario triggers the brain to prepare for the threat, causing an increase in heart rate, muscle tension, and irregular breathing.

Consequently, the anticipation of potential danger often leads to avoidance of the situation altogether.

While foresight is valuable, overreliance on this ‘what-if’ strategy can paradoxically make you more reactive and fearful, contrary to the intended outcome of helping you feel safer.

Some people resort to “what-if” thinking because it seems to offer control over unpredictable future events. Most of the imagined scenarios, though plausible, are statistically unlikely.

For instance, although it’s possible to be attacked at a store, the odds are quite slim.

Moreover, “what-if” thinking tends to focus only on negative outcomes, neglecting the potential for positive scenarios.

Furthermore, while the intention might be to help you prepare for some feared situation, over time, this thinking pattern becomes an ineffective preparation strategy.

And, while constantly avoiding potentially dangerous or unpleasant situations might create an illusion of safety, it can also stop you from fully participating in life.

A healthier alternative to “what-if” thinking is a “what-is” strategy, which focuses on the present moment.

When plagued by anxiety-inducing hypothetical situations, you can challenge these thoughts by acknowledging that the feared scenario isn’t happening in that moment, and then describing the current, tangible reality (e.g., “I am preparing to go to the store”).

This method can ground you in your immediate surroundings, reminding you that, in this moment, you are safe.

Ultimately, it’s essential to trust in your capacity to react appropriately when genuine threats arise. But in the meantime, live in the present, assuring yourself, “In this breath, I am okay.”

Practice mindfulness by acknowledging what’s happening in each moment, confronting any “what-if” thoughts, and focusing on the here and now. It’s a journey towards staying present, embracing calmness, and breathing.

If this type of hyper-vigilant thinking is a problem for you, maybe we should chat.

Adapted from: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/healing-sexual-trauma/201908/the-allure-and-trap-anticipating-danger

#selfdoubt #imposter #anxiety #stress #worry #overwhelm #fear #procrastination #selfesteem #selfconfidence #emptiness #loneliness #failure #sadness #guilt #selftalk #burnout

Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn

Check out these products...

Find more of my self-help products in my Shop. Click HERE

Sleep your way to success: a neuroscientific view

Sleep your way to success: a neuroscientific view

In our unrelenting pursuit of success, many of us perceive sleep as a hurdle to overcome. Yet, as we venture deeper into the realm of neuroscience, we discover that sleep is not just a necessity for our well-being; it’s a strategic tool that can propel us towards our dreams.

Read More »
Heal your self-critical mind

Heal your self-critical mind

Do you ever find yourself plagued by a nagging inner critic that never seems satisfied with what you do? Constantly pulling you back and undermining you, leaving greater success just out of reach?

Read More »
How to let go of unwanted thoughts

How to let go of unwanted thoughts

Do you ever feel like a prisoner to your own thoughts? One minute you’re going about your day, and the next, you’re engulfed by a wave of negativity. It’s as if your mind has a mind of its own, filling up with self-doubt, worry, or regret. But what if I told you that you could not only escape but actually flip the script?

Read More »
A simple technique for instant stress relief

A simple technique for instant stress relief

We’ve all been there—those moments when stress or anxiety suddenly kicks in, leaving us feeling overwhelmed and uneasy. But what if I told you there’s a quick and straightforward breathing technique that can help you regain control?

Read More »
The unseen battle: understanding your ‘Inner Struggles’

The unseen battle: understanding your ‘Inner Struggles’

You’re not alone if you’ve ever felt like you’re at war with yourself. Maybe you’re constantly stressed about work, grappling with self-doubt, or frozen by indecisiveness. These internal conflicts, or what we often call “inner struggles,” can feel like an uphill battle that never seems to end. Let’s break down what these struggles usually mean and how you can begin to manage them for a more balanced life.

Read More »
How your breath affects your brain and emotions

How your breath affects your brain and emotions

Let’s explore a recent scientific finding that might change how you view something you do all the time—breathe. You take about 20,000 breaths a day, and it turns out, how you breathe matters more than you think. Breathing is directly connected to your brain and how you feel emotionally.

Read More »

Please note that, at times,  I provide links to free and paid products that you might find useful as you strive for greater success in your work or business life. 

I also recommend resources by others that you might find of value. It is important to mention that I only recommend products that I have had satisfactory, or better, personal experience with or, otherwise have good reason to recommend them.

Please note that some of these links are affiliate links, in which case I might receive some form of remuneration if you purchase the product using my link. While this will not add to your cost, any payments received in this way will assist in keeping this site running to help people such as yourself.

Scroll to Top

We use cookies to ensure that we give you the best experience on our website. If you continue to use this site we will assume that you understand and accept this along with our terms and conditions, shown here.

download your free ebook .....

10 Top Tips for Success

Fill in your details and download it now