Over the years, I’ve worked with a number of clients who have moved from a technical position into a role that involves managing people. They know their technical work. What they’re less sure about is how to handle some of the conversations that now come with the job.
When you’ve spent years dealing with buildings, structures or drainage systems, managing people calls for some additional skills. People have their own interpretations, concerns and ways of responding, and you can’t necessarily predict what will happen when you raise an issue. Some people seem to take to this quite naturally. Others find it much less comfortable.
In my previous article, I described how changing where I sat in a university lecture theatre helped me take my studies more seriously. That was a change in my surroundings. Another possible obstacle is capability. You know broadly what needs doing, but you haven’t yet developed a particular skill that would help you do it.
You may sense this without having quite put it into words. A conversation gets postponed because you’re unsure how to begin, or how you’ll respond if the other person becomes defensive.
With clients in this situation, part of our work has involved learning about rapport and practising difficult conversations. We’ve rehearsed how to raise a concern, listen to the response and work towards a useful next step. Those practice sessions also give us something specific to discuss and refine. I’ve seen clients go on to do well as they’ve developed these skills and become more comfortable using them.
Of course, a skill gap isn’t always the whole explanation. You might know how to have the conversation and still worry about upsetting someone. But it helps to establish whether there’s something you need to learn.
Think about a step you’ve been hesitating to take. Could you name the particular skill that would make it easier? Perhaps you need an explanation, a demonstration, some practice or feedback from someone experienced. Before judging yourself for hesitating, consider whether you’ve had a fair opportunity to learn how.
#EngineeringManagement #DifficultConversations #ProfessionalDevelopment
